The chapters in our lives...each one takes a kind of resilience and a kind of courage. Right now our whole world is taking on a LONG and complicated chapter that affects everything we know and love. The pandemic combined with political change, racial tension that surely needs addressing, and terrible weather events that have affected so many people. So many economic fears and people trying hard to keep their heads above water. Food uncertainty and schools in crisis.
It's easy to get down as this goes on and on, isn't it? Trying to find the positive things to keep us moving forward...looking for people with the resilience and the hope and the character that makes us feel that there is a future and that it will be better than the one we're living in.
And we all know that our own awareness and attitude will keep us on the path. But now and then we lose our way. At those times I sit beside the path and take deep breaths, read a poem or two, find a tree to hug, a Zentangle to tangle, spend a quiet morning on our patio in the warmth and shade of the bottlebrush tree listening to the fountains.
And right in the middle of this coping, Greg and I decide to add another layer of personal uncertainty...foolishness or bravery...we are not sure. When the independent living apartments in Madison, WI where we have our names on a waiting list for three years suddenly calls...we are left breathless with a decision that needed to be made quickly. So we said yes and within a month, had sold our home here in Florida and had closing dates there and here, hired a moving van, and started "burning our bridges" as we moved forward into a new reality for our personal lives as well.
We have about 7 weeks left to finish up the good byes, decide what to pack, get Greg's DBS battery surgically replaced up at Shands Hospital, have a garage sale, try to prepare for -15 degrees in mid winter Wisconsin in January. All the while trying to keep safe and well. Just like lots of other people. All without the physical support of family and friends available as we must stay isolated. Lots of emotional support...just no one here to help pack the boxes or wrap the dishes in the bubble wrap. (I sound a little whiney, don't I?). Really I am not worried about that. We have plenty of time to do this slowly and with purpose. But it would have been fun and give us closure to have done it with others...to share the experience. But it's the same for everyone. We carry on. We do it so that next year we can be together again.
The word resilience comes up a lot in my world right now. I thought the photo above was a good image for it. I am sitting outside as I write this...on my favorite swing sing in the shade. It is about 82 degrees here and it smells of flowers. A bright little wren just shared the patio with me for awhile. Anoles flit about hopping from tree to plant. There is a slight breeze. Soon (with masks) we'll join another couple across the street to have our turkey with the trimmings...outdoor on their patio. We watched the Macy Day Parade on TV. I made the traditional pecan pie. A little bit of tradition. We'll do a family zoom tonight with our loved ones. One of our children and one of our grandchildren has had Covid. But managed to recover okay with no hospital involved.
Let's dream together of a new world we'll have when this is over. Let's dream of us all doing it together. So let's carry on. Someone wrote:
Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. ...Itʼs a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice;
I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open Iʼll focus on the new day and all the happy memories Iʼve stored away, just for this time in my life.
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